With Me All the Time
I have often been ashamed
Of my need to be alone.
And it's not to say
That I don't long for people. I do.
I need others deeply, perhaps too deeply.
But I also need my solitude,
Perhaps more than other people.
And I wonder if it is because
There are so many others with me all the time.
I cannot pick them up and put them down.
There are no superficial conversations.
And it all, they all, weigh upon me
All the time.
Their stories cling to me,
Reach down deep inside of me,
And turn me over and over wondering.
Solitude gives me time and space
To process that,
And to hear the songs
That rise up in response,
Songs for the people I love
But whom I cannot see just now.
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